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CHECKING BOXES

Without my biggest stressor in my life anymore (my job) – I finally feel free. I feel like I can breathe again, and sleep again, and live my life again! No longer am I living to work – and that is such an amazing feeling. Honestly, I don’t have a desire at all to enter back into the corporate, 9a-5p, working world ever again. In fact, actually securing a new job and entering back into that world gives me a lot of anxiety. I really want to be able to branch out and do my own thing. I want to find out who I am, and what my natural talents are, and actually use them!

‘My own thing’. I’m not entirely sure what that is yet – but I am so tired of being told what my next steps in life are. I am not living to ‘check a box’, and I always feel like that is what I am doing. Don’t you? Since our first memories in life, we have been going to school, and participating in curricular activities to look good to boys and friends, or to look good to colleges. Then we go off to these colleges, rack up our student loans and life long debts, graduate and jump into the real world. And we date until we find ‘the one’, which then makes us feel pressured to get engaged, married, and start having babies. Don’t forget – we have to find the money to buy a house in there too! And we work day in and day out until the government says we are eligible for retirement. Then, and only then, are we finally free to start living life the way we want – when we are over 65 years old…

The everyday life pressures are really getting to me, and I want to rebel against them. Who says I need to have a 9a-5p corporate job? And do I really want one, or do I feel the need to have one just to prove to others how ‘great’ I am? Why can’t I have a gap on my resume if I want some time off to actually enjoy my life? I am supposed to have this precious piece of paper, time lining my every move since high school. To gain the respect of strangers? As soon as we are born, we are already working. Working to learn to eat on our own and walk on our own. After 30 years of non-stop stress and working, I feel entitled to take a break! (yes – I am part of the entitled millennial generation). Until I find the next box to check, I feel pretty content just hanging out in this coffee shop, writing this blog, and discovering who I actually am – not who people tell me I need to be.

 

NO MORE CHECKING BOXES!